I have always been a somewhat picky eater. It drove my mother crazy when I was growing up. Likewise it drove me crazy that she kept cooking foods I hated and wondered why I wouldn’t eat them.

She was from the Depression Era, a time when there was no such thing as being a picky eater. A combination of not enough food to go around and constant hunger meant that she did not have the luxury of being picky. Faced with the alternative of starvation, people will eat anything. Nowadays most of us are not willing to starve our children into submission, though it can be tempting some days.

When I was growing up I was forced to eat whatever was on my plate. The food I refused to eat would be wrapped up, put in the fridge, and served to me cold at the next meal. Food was always an issue. And I swore that when I had children I would not make an issue of it.

I read this article last week which discusses the findings of a study led by Dr. Lucy Cooke of the department of epidemiology and public health at University College London, that was published in the American Journal of Clinical Nutrition in August.

Researchers examined the eating habits of 5,390 pairs of twins between 8 and 11 years old and found children’s aversions to trying new foods are mostly inherited.
The message to parents: It’s not your cooking, it’s your genes.

For an interesting twist in our family, my husband is not a picky eater at all. The only thing, and I do mean only thing, he doesn’t like is raw onions. Everything else he will happily eat. Though he doesn’t like sweets. That means cakes, cookies, pastries, pies, chocolate can all sit there without tempting him in the least.

I have one son who is exactly like him. A child who will pass up treats and ask for carrot sticks; a child who piles his plate high with vegetables and salad. I know…who is this child?  And you know if he were my only child I would feel smugly superior, but alas I have others who keep me humble.

Researchers have found:

Most children eat a wide variety of foods until they are around 2, when they suddenly stop. The phase can last until the child is 4 or 5.

Based on my experience with my children I have definitely found this to be the case. Most all of my children were open to foods while they were young toddlers, and then suddenly when the terrible twos hit in full force and they have wills of their own, they begin asserting themselves in all areas, including what foods to put in their mouths.

There is an infamous photo of me as a toddler eating a hot dog. This would explain to my mother why I ate that when I had just turned two years old and yet refused to each and every time afterward. That would include now 36 years later. I have never liked hot dogs. Granted, now as an adult I seldom gag and throw myself on the ground crying when offered a hot dog, but don’t think I haven’t thought about it.

The beauty of having many children is that all these parenting issues quickly become clear. I realized long ago that I can not take the credit for this child’s good eating habits and more than I should berate myself for the picky habits of my other children. It’s just how they are.

The researchers say that this phase passes eventually. You just have to ride it out like a hellish storm. Don’t become emotionally invested over whether they eat or not.

I can tell you that as a grown up I eat a wide variety of foods now, only held back by food allergies. And my soon to be 13 year old, who used to be extremely picky, now that he is in the throes of puberty and growing like a weed, he will eat anything and everything in as large of quantities as he can get it. Some nights he will look over to his younger sibling’s plates at dinner and say, “Are you going to finish that?”