2008 September | Mommy Points

September 30, 2008

I Think I Need a Raise

Filed under: Just For Fun, On The Web — Chris @ 1:29 am

According to a new study, the average SAHM works 94.4 hours per week, which makes it the equivalant of two full time jobs.

For 2008, Salary.com determined that the time mothers spend performing the 10 most popular “Mom job functions” would equate to an annual cash compensation of $116,805 for a Stay-at-Home Mom and $68,405 for a Working Mom, down from last years calculations of $138,094 and $85,938.

Don’t you wish there was actually a paycheck that came at the end of the week? I know exactly what I would do with it -hire someone to do all the annoying jobs I don’t want to do.

What does this mean if you are also working from home while taking care of your children and the house? Other than you are burning the candle at both ends? Salary.com fails to address this huge segment of mothers.

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September 27, 2008

It’s A Craft

Filed under: Children, cooking — Chris @ 1:15 am

At least in my mind they are. Because who has room to store project after project!

There is something about baking and cooking that children love. I suspect it has to do with taking ingredients, that seem somehow random to them, combining them and coming up with something that tastes good.

“It’s like magic!” one of my children recently exclaimed after we baked a loaf of bread.

Pretzel Recipe (makes 12 largish pretzels)

2 cups flour
1/4 tsp salt
1/2 tsp sugar
7/8 cup water
1 1/2 tsp active dry yeast

Mix it all together like you would bread.

Don’t know how to do it? Don’t have a bread maker with a dough setting?

This is a great tactile experience for younger children. And it is extremely easy to do. I know what you are thinking, I used to be afraid of baking bread too.

Get a mixing bowl.
Measure water in first, room temperature. Too hot or cold and it will not rise.
Then pour the flour, sugar, and salt in the bowl in a little mound.
Dig a little hole in the top of the mound, like a volcano.
Put the yeast in the little mound.

Then stir it all up.

When it is doughy, dump it out onto a floured table and knead it.

This is the part when all the kids can help.

After they are done kneading, put it in a bowl and cover the bowl with a damp cloth so the dough doesn’t dry out while rising.

Once it has doubled in size, it is ready to shape into pretzels.

Break the dough into 12 pieces.

Your children can make the traditional pretzel shape. Form the dough into letters or shapes. Or even just leave them as pretzel sticks, but that would be boring.

Once you are done shaping them beat an egg and brush it over the pretzel.

Sprinkle them with Kosher salt.

Or a mixture of cinnamon and sugar.

Place on a greased cookie sheet and bake at 450 for 10-15 minutes. The time will depend on the thickness you have rolled the pretzels to. So keep an eye on them. Once they are golden, they are ready to come out of the oven and enjoy.

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September 26, 2008

I Share Because I Love

Filed under: Humor Keeps Me Sane — Chris @ 1:10 am

I am frequently asked this question, about a variety of things in my life.

And I hate to say it, but there is no secret. I think that most of the time we realize this and understand that there is no miracle. Though we wish for a burning bush to magically speak to us and show us the way to clutter free home and a perfect body, without having to do any work of course.

The secret to losing weight? Well moving more and eating less calories. There is no secret pill going to make us all magically fit and trim.

The secret to a flat stomach? Well, never having your stomach stretched out to accommodate a watermelon would be a start. As would be doing sit ups. I strike out on both accounts. I have enough extra skin on my stomach to make a suit of skin for a whole ‘nother person. Remember that serial killer in Silence of the Lambs? He could have just had my stomach and never had to kill anyone, though I suppose that would not have been the point.

The secret to being wrinkle free at 40? Genetics and a life spent living in cave without sunlight.

The secret to a clean house? Uh, cleaning it? Never letting it get to the point where it is too messy to clean up easily.

The same goes for cooking dinner, organizing things, and –the bane of my existence– keeping up with laundry…

But still it doesn’t stop all of us, me included, from searching for that miracle pill, the perfect system that will revolutionize our existence, a panacea that requires no expended effort.

Today I have a real secret to share.

You know how in the winter when you wear a hat you are faced with hair that stands up like you are clutching an electric ball. To prevent this I keep a dryer sheet in my coat pocket. When I take off my hat I rub the dryer sheet surreptitiously on my head.

Yes, I may look like a sweaty old bald man shining his head when I do this, but no fly away hair clinging to my face. And that makes it worth it.

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September 25, 2008

Twelve Years Ago

Filed under: Keeping It Real, On The Web, cooking — Chris @ 3:27 pm

1996 was a long time ago. It is the year my second son was born, but other than that I am at a loss for what I was doing.

One woman bought a McDonald’s hamburger.

And she still has it. Even more shocking, it looks exactly the same as the day she bought it. If that doesn’t make you rethink putting fast food into your body, I don’t know what will.

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September 22, 2008

September Is National Disaster Preparedness Month

Filed under: Humor Keeps Me Sane, Ideas, Keeping It Real — Chris @ 10:50 pm

Not all of us live in areas where we are going to be hit by tornadoes, tsunamis, or flash flooding. But most of us will at one time or another experience a situation where our comforts that we expect living in the 21st century, are stripped away.

Maybe just for a day or two, but our level of preparedness can make the difference between having an “adventure” or being a complete embarrassment to our pioneer ancestors. I’ll admit it right here, it is a good thing that I was born during the century that I was.

I am a wimp.

I live in an area where winter storms frequently knock out power for extended periods of time. I am furiously knocking on wood as I type this because it has been a few years since we have lost power for an extended number of days.

In the winter, the icy cold frigid winter, of 2003 we had a snow storm that knocked out power to our entire area for 6 days. Six long LONG days.

You have heard it said that what doesn’t kill you, teaches you something. Oh, let me share my wisdom:

When there is a widespread power outage, none of the gas pumps will be working. So if you only have a small bit of gas in your car, a usual occurrence here at my house, you will be stuck at home.

If you have a well, like our house at the time did, you will not have running water. You will, however, try to turn the water on several times a day as well as flush the toilet.

Your electric stove won’t work. (Duh.)

Your outdoor grill might be buried under a couple feet of frozen snow.

You will not be able to find matches. And going out to the car, starting it, pushing in the cigarette lighter so that you can light a rolled up piece of paper to light your camp stove, will NOT be fun. Especially when it burns down to your fingers and you have to drop it before ever lighting anything.

You will gladly trade one of your small children for a small percolator so you can make coffee in the morning on your camp stove.

You will need that coffee and wine more than ever before. Maybe simultaneously.

Have a corkscrew handy.

When there is a storm brewing, make sure that you have batteries for all of your flashlights. Lighters or matches, and candles are also very good.

What have we done to prepare?

1) We bought large kerosene heaters and make sure to always have plenty of kerosene on hand during the winter.

2) When there are storms coming in we make sure that our cars are filled up with gas.

3) Camp stove and camping gear (sleeping bags) are easily accessible. (And fuel for the cook stove so you aren’t eating dry raman noodles)

4) Fill up all tubs with water, for washing, flushing toilets

5) Make sure that we have food to eat that does not require cooking or refrigeration. Things like those individual cups of Raman are always good to have on hand since you only pour boiling water into the cup and it cook right there.

6) Get some disposable plates and silverware. Since you may not be able to wash anything, do you want to have it piling up? I don’t.

7) I JUST bought a crank battery operated weather radio last winter. So that when our power goes out and there is three feet of snow on the ground I can turn on my radio and find out that there is three feet of snow on the ground.

So those are my tips for small disasters, though that is probably too strong of a word to describe the times when my power is out and I can not access the internet or vacuum for 36 hours.

FEMA has a disaster supply list of things that every family should consider having on hand. Most of these things I already have in my first aid kits. But look over their website, it is chockfull of information that might be appropriate for you and your family.

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September 21, 2008

I Bet He Doesn’t Leave Them On the Floor

Filed under: Children — Chris @ 9:15 am

When you were a kid do remember pouring over the Guinness Book of World Records and trying to see what world records you could possibly break? Or what about the Brady Bunch episode where Cindy and Bobby want to break the world’s record for teeter-tottering?

I remember being fascinated by the idea of being the world’s best in anything. And now my kids have discovered the books and they go through phases where they are are talking about what records they can break.

“I bet I could stay awake for five days straight, Mom!” Uh, no honey because I would probably kill you by day three.

“I bet I could blow the biggest bubblegum bubble, Mom!” Uh no, you are not putting five packs of gum into your mouth.

And before you ask, you are continuing to cut your fingernails, bathe, and you are not swallowing fire, knives or anything else dangerous. I know. I am mean.

Today I read about a man who has the world’s largest Lego collection. Two million pieces to be exact.

I’d say my children are well on their way to beating this man’s collection. Or at least they would be if I didn’t keep vacuuming them up and throwing them away.

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September 20, 2008

Things I Wonder

Filed under: Children, Humor Keeps Me Sane, parenting — Chris @ 8:54 am

1) Why can’t anyone replace the toilet paper when they use it up and why can’t the child who frantically screams for me from the bathroom throw away the empty toilet paper tube? Are we saving them in a pile behind the bathroom door for a reason?

2) Why in one week will some of my children accrue three weeks worth of dirty clothing in the laundry baskets, yet have only one pair of underwear?

3) Why my children think the rule about no shoes upstairs doesn’t apply to them if they are just “running up there real quick” because clearly the dirt on your shoes will know this?

4) Why, when my children make themselves sandwiches, or bagels, or basically anything, the person who got the stuff out doesn’t put it away because other people still need it, but the last child who uses it doesn’t put it away because he didn’t get it out?

5) Why no one can remove and replace the garbage bag and instead keep shoving garbage into the garbage can when it is overflowing? And then PRETEND they didn’t notice it was overflowing?

6) Disappearing socks. ‘nuf said.

Comments (3)

September 18, 2008

Mean Boys, Mean Boys, Whacha Gonna Do…

Filed under: Children, parenting — Chris @ 9:42 am

Somehow girls have gotten the reputation of being mean. I can think of countless movies in which the girls are portrayed as being mean spirited, jealous, and down right evil to other girls. A new study reveals that this reputation is not justly earned, boys are just as socially aggressive as girls. We already know that girls are becoming more and more physically aggressive with each other.

Boys are as likely as girls to be socially aggressive by doing things such as spreading rumors, gossiping and intentionally excluding others, says a U.S. researcher.

Having lots of boys, I find the study surprising. But researchers said the the belief is so ingrained in parents and educators that most don’t believe the data.

Researchers looked at 148 studies that included almost 74,000 children and teens. [They] said the belief that girls are more likely to be socially aggressive than boys persists among teachers, parents and others because of social expectations that develop early in life, which are fueled by movies and books that depict girls being mean and socially aggressive toward each other.

I’ll admit that none of my boys have had problems with other boys being “mean” to them, at least not more than any single isolated incident. None of my friend’s sons have had issues either. But almost all of my friends with girls report girl bullying.

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September 16, 2008

Birthday Party Etiquette

Filed under: Children, parenting — Chris @ 11:47 pm

My son was invited to two birthday parties recently where I did not know the families personally. They were just kids he had befriended from his sports team.

We don’t know much about these kids, their likes and dislikes, other than they enjoy football.

So we got the kids each a gift card and attached it to a big bag of candy. What kid doesn’t love candy?

It seems that more and more people are giving gift cards in lieu of gifts. This makes the dilemma even more difficult of how much money to spend on the present. When you buy a gift you can get it on sale, find something cheap that looks cool, basically be a bargain hunter. When you give money it is just that, money. Can’t pretend that the $20 bill really cost $30 can you?

I am curious… what sorts of things do you buy for birthday presents for those kids you really don’t know very well? Are gift cards the way to go? They seem so impersonal. Are there other sorts of presents perhaps I hadn’t considered?

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September 15, 2008

Schedule, Do You Need One?

Filed under: Uncategorized — Chris @ 10:10 pm

I get email frequently from people who ask simply, “How do you do it?” They want to know what the secret is to running their homes and staying organized. And honestly I have no answer other than to just do it. Listen to me, I sound like a NIKE ad.

I think the way to start getting a hold on things is to develop a routine, a sort of lose schedule that isn’t neccessarily based on the time of day, but rather event based.

Certain things always happen in the same order, and while I find this predictable and boring, my younger children especially like it. I suppose that so much is unclear to them in their lives that they like knowing what is going to happen and when. Think of it as expanding the brush your teeth, read a story, and then go to sleep routine.

If you are working from home be honest with how much time you need to accomplish your work. Trying to squeeze it in around other things means that you never feel “off.” Work is always in the back of your mind and you are mentally ruishing through things so that you can finish up. Much better to have a set time and then walk away. Kids can tell when they are being brushed off, and much the same way as adults, they don’t like it.

Charge up your children’s neediness batteries. Yes, I write down spending time with my children on a list like it is a chore to be accomplished. Because, c’mon let’s be honest how many of us really want to play another game of Candy Land in our lives? Yeah, I thought so.

I have found that if I spend some time upfront with my children they are more accepting of giving me some space so I can do work later on uninterrupted. It’s like charging up their neediness batteries. After spending some quality time with me they are charged up and ready to play independently for a while. If they know that they will have their fun time with me at some point they are also willing to be somewhat accomodating if I have to say not now.

Mealtimes are pretty set in my house, and might be a good place to start developing your own routine. It doesn’t have to be something intense that you write in half hour increments and you are a slave to it. A routine is guide to get you through the day.

Here breakfast is at 8:30am, lunch at 1:15, snack at 3:30, and dinner at 6:00. Everything else works around this. These times are somewhat flexible, but they happen within 15 minutes on either side. Unless like now it is football season, then everything is just thrown to the wind. The other marker here is naptime for my youngest which is from 2:00-4:00. During 2:00-4:00 is when anything that is messy or not for a one year old is done. Things like painting, playdoh playing, or knife juggling.

Think of the time around these events as blocks of time in which you have things to accomplish. You have needs, your children have needs, and all of you have, sometimes conflicting, wants.

What do you need to do in the period of the morning before breakfast? Write them down. Are there things that you wish you could accomplish during this time period but never seem to get around to it? Write it down also with a little star next to it. Do the same for the period after breakfast and before lunch. And so on. Are there things that are time dependent that you need to accomodate? Such as a nap, or bon-bon eating while watching Oprah, or for my 1 and 3 yr olds watching that insipid Caillou. write those times down where they go on the list where they would go.

Since, I assume, you do not have seven children like I do and therefore need to do laundry round the clock, make it part of your routine. Have two laundry baskets for your entire family to share. One will have clean clothes and spend it’s day in the laundry room. The other will be wherever you keep dirty clothes. And then the next day they switch. Right after breakfast pop a load into the washing machine. Right after lunch switch it to the dryer. Right after the kids go to bed fold the clothes and stick the stinky cloth diapers into the washing machine. Bring the basket of clean clothes to your room. In the morning put it away when you get everyone dressed. As a bonus you can just bypass the drawers and have everyone wear the same outfit again. At the end of the day you should have a basket filled with your dirty clothes and dishtowels for the day, and one filled entirely with clean stuff. And then you begin again.

Obviously this is only an example. Change it around to fit your own needs. Can’t leave the kids unsupervised to toss the laundry in at breakfast time? How about before they get up.

Take two minutes when the children are in the bathtub to wash the toilet and sink.

Doing little bits at a time means that the job never gets so big and so out of hand that it is overwhelming.

So to recap, you do not need to schedule out every moment of your day into five minute intervals. Having a routine allows you and your children to know what is comoing next, plan for it, and hopefully get everything done that you need and want to get done on any given day.

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