Boy, this is a tough one isn’t it. Even the experts don’t agree on this.
On the one hand, we are all a family, a team, and we should all work together as one to keep things running smoothly. No one gets paid for doing nothing.
On the other hand, don’t kids need some sort of motivation for doing the chores? Should children be responsible for chores without being paid for their services?
On the other , other hand (why yes, I do have more than two hands I am a mother after all) maybe there is a middle ground.
In my house allowance is not directly tied to chores. For several reasons, not the least of which is I don’t want my children thinking that chores are something they can opt out of by relinquishing their allowance. Not likely to happen when your children are young and not able to earn any extra money from other sources, but once they get older it could be a real possibility.
Do you want your 16 yr old coming to you and saying, “Thanks, but you can just keep your $8.”
At my house you aren’t allowed to just NOT do your chores, whatever they might be. You will do them or nothing else will happen until they are completed. And completed in an acceptable manner.
Frankly, I also don’t want the hassle of deducting money from their allowance for every infraction.
But by using the handipoints system, you can assign points that are not tied to an allowance. You can assign points to each chore and then grade your child’s performance on the point system. You can give bonus points if a job is exceptionally well done, or take away points if it was not done well. And they can use these points for the bonus rewards I discussed the other day. This seems like the perfect compromise to me.
I know other people do tie their allowance to chores. And their reasons seem logical to me as well. That in the real world people are paid for jobs they do and do well. And if that system works for you, great!
My feeling has been that if you are part of a family, you share in both the responsibilities and the privelages of that family. The older you are, the more of both you have. For the kids, this translates into allowance and chores, among other things. So, while the oldest gets more allowance, she also has more chores, down to the baby, who does little in the way of set chores, but also does not yet get an allowance. Breaking rules, consistently forgetting chores or doing a lousy job, back talk, etc. might be punishable by deducting from their allowance or they might lose other privelages. Same with good behaviour. It might be rewarded with a little extra pocket money but it also might be rewarded with an ice-cream cone, a game together, getting to watch a little telly, etc.
The point system sounds great and I bet it would work great with my kids. The problem is, it wouldn’t work so great with me. I’d make a mess of trying to keep it all straight. A pity really, because I wonder if it would work better than what we have going.
Comment by t in hd — July 4, 2007 @ 1:19 pm
Hi T, I’d be excited to learn how you would like to improve the current Handipoints parents site to make it easier for you.
Viva
Comment by Viva — July 5, 2007 @ 1:37 am
Hi Viva, I will be honest, I haven’t looked it over very carefully yet. I only know the gist of it. However, since posting my above comment a week or so back, I’ve had it in the back of my head, and I’m thinking I should give it a closer look. I’m growing weary of hearing my voice say the same things to the kids over and over again. I think our system needs some shaking up (or the kids do!). Once the end-of-the-school-year madness of school plays, grillfests, concerts and day trips has finished, I plan to look at the Handipoints system again. It can’t possibly be more work for me than what I’m already dealing with trying to keep the kids motivated around here.
Comment by t in hd — July 14, 2007 @ 8:52 am
T,
Any system that works requires some work, right
Actually once you sit down and go through the initial set up of the charts, chores, points, rewards, etc it pretty much runs itself.
chris
Comment by Chris — July 14, 2007 @ 4:48 pm