My daughter was invited to a classmates 7 yr old birthday party this weekend. When I got the invitation I was happy to see that it was a home party, not some completely over the top extravaganza. I went to the party assuming that I would be able to just drop her off. Isn’t that what you are supposed to do at birthday parties?
But suddenly I was inside the house among a sea of mothers who were all staying, and hovering over their children. All while I stood there contemplating my exit. After about a half hour I finally asked if it would be okay of I left and went to do my grocery shopping. The house seemed awfully cramped with children and their parents, and in some cases siblings. And frankly, I am more than a little concerned about what is going to happen when my daughter has her birthay party! Is there a way to write on the invitation “no parents and no siblings” without it being awkward.
I felt bad leaving the party, for oh, ten seconds, then I merrily skipped down the driveway.
Is this the new norm for birthday parties? Do parents usually stay? I am trying to think back to my own childhood but I am pretty sure that when I was 6 and 7 yrs old the only parties I went to were family parties.
Next time ask the hostess & blame it on the northeast. “When I lived in CT, the parents dropped off the kids and picked them up 2 hrs later. Is the custom different in Texas?”
Comment by Kathy from NJ — October 26, 2009 @ 5:15 am
On your daughter’s invitation, write that it’s a Drop-Off. I love seeing that on an invite. That way it is clear to the other parents that it is OK to leave.
Comment by divrchk — October 26, 2009 @ 8:41 am
I have had the same situation with mixed results. Only if I feel the Mom is overwhelmed (10 kids – 1 mom) do I stay to help out. If I stay, I consider myself a helper, not a guest. I am a New Englander, so maybe it is a CT thing.
Comment by Claire — October 26, 2009 @ 10:47 am
I leave my kids every time I can. And I’m in the NW. I also tell parents up front that they can just leave their kids. I think many times parents stay because they are not sure if it’s ok to leave.
Comment by Lucinda — October 26, 2009 @ 12:14 pm
I think birthday parties are a mix. It seems that the switch from stay there to drop off happens around the Kindergarten/1st grade age in our area. Last year we had 18 7-yr old boys running around our house for a “drop-off” party. I put a sign up sheet near the door so parents could leave an emergency phone number and then be on their merry way. They were welcome to stay, but when most found out they didn’t need to, they signed the sheet with glee and left for two hours.
Comment by Miriam — October 26, 2009 @ 1:07 pm
It seems to be the new norm for the younger ones, anyway. I’ve felt trapped and confused myself, so on my invitations for my daughter’s upcoming birthday, I stated it was an option (so long as we had a way to reach them in an emergency)!
Comment by Brigitte — October 28, 2009 @ 8:05 am